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  • Am I setting the Wrong Goals?

    Posted on by Heather

    A recent question from a loyal follower:

    “Being a new grad, I am constantly doing what I love most: coming up with action plans to reach my professional goals. But like most new grads, my life keeps changing in the blink of an eye, and it seems like the minute I settle on an action plan or professional goal, something drastic changes and I have to set a new goal, or make a new plan. Does this mean I’m setting the wrong goals? Making a plan that’s too specific?”


    My response:

    First of all – kudos to you, since from my perspective you’ve got one thing nailed “you are constantly doing what you LOVE‘! This is a point not to be ignored. Interestingly, your life (the constant change) seems to allow for you to have the opportunity to come up with new plans all the time – a coincidence? I think not!

    The fact that (unless I’m mis-reading this) you spend a good part of your time ‘feeling good’ because you’re doing what you love is phenomenal. If more people got on this plan – the world would be a better place. Your ability to adapt, change, regroup, and retry is a developing skill-set that will serve you well in all your present and future endeavours. Because as humans we are creatures of habit (our greatest asset and biggest curse), our ability to change quickly and adapt often can get lost, because ‘staying the same’ appears to be easier and a less resistant path. You, perhaps without realizing, appear to be honing and tempering what will likely serve you in a major way – your openness to embrace change, set new goals and adjust your plan.

    The fact that you still apply what are foundational steps (setting goals, writing out your plan and taking action) even when things change quickly, is noteworthy.

    Life is not supposed to ‘look’ a certain way, but being alive definitely ‘feels’ a certain way.

    From the outside looking in, I think you’re off to a great start! Trust your feelings – they are your greatest clue and best marker to know whether or not you’re on track. Keep doing what you love! A few more notes below to keep you grounded and plugging away.

    1. Don’t compare yourself to others or to a ‘certain way’.

    Just because things seem to be moving quickly and changing even quicker, doesn’t mean anything is ‘wrong’. It just is what it is. Stay true to yourself and true to what’s working for you. Setting your own goals and writing out your own plans will keep you aware and focussed while helping you navigate a path of development. Embrace your life and the way you choose to live it – you know better than anyone what makes you feel alive – if nothing else, keep chasing that feeling.

    2. Don’t judge yourself, be hard on yourself, or get down on yourself. (And if/when you do, don’t judge yourself for that either:)

    Your life is your life, no one else’s. Don’t live it for anyone else. Don’t try to please anyone else. Don’t try to impress anyone else. Live your life in a way that makes you FEEL amazing. If you don’t feel amazing, make whatever changes necessary to get back to that feeling.

    3. Build a strong relationship with yourself. Trust yourself and your own wisdom.

    I know it might be hard to accept but YOU are your greatest resource and wisest advisor. Look within when you seek answers to your deepest questions. Trust your answers, trust your guidance and follow your own advice.

    Thank you to A.B. for a wonderful question and an opportunity for me to add my two-bits. Keep em coming!

    -HW

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