I had the great honour and privilege to speak on Day 1 of Beyond Pink 2010 (#bp2010) and I was so incredibly energized by the whole experience.
Confession #1: The day before the conference I still didn’t feel convinced on what I was going to present. I knew the content I wanted to share (lessons I’ve learned that I think could help others), but, it was more a question of which context? what stories? – I’ve learned so much – which is the most important? what really matters to a 22 yr. old? what will really help them? what do they need to hear?
In reflection, I’m so shocked at how much of a ‘fear’ mode I entered in to when I was in preparing because I was ‘Worrying, stressing, over-thinking etc.’ I wanted so badly to present something amazing, inspirational, life changing, magical….I almost forgot, what they wanted most to hear was ‘how’? How I did it, and how I thought they could do it. All I had to do was tell the truth, tell my story, and be myself – I feel a “that was easy” Staples button push at this moment and I’m sure the 48 hrs leading up to my presentation could have been a lot smoother if I had made this realization a little earlier. But hey, these are the growing ‘pains’ of life.
When I arrived at Beyond Pink, as usual I was blown away. These ladies had put together a meticulously organized event with authentically energized volunteers – it was an amazing experience! They had all the details covered and as a speaker, I’ve been to many conferences – these girls took such amazing care of me – it was definitely a ‘rock star’ feeling – thank you!!!
When I saw how they had so cleverly organized the speaker sessions, of which conference attendees got to choose which sessions they’d go to – I hit major panic mode. Confession # 2 – I saw the bowl for my session and there were only 3 tabs inside to which I assumed (MAJOR MISTAKE) that only 3 people wanted to come to my session. I had an egoic moment where I questioned my entire existence on the planet, and quickly snapped myself back to earth and affirmed the thought ‘I trust that the right people will be in the room for the right reasons and if that is only 3 people – then that is the way it is meant to be.”
It turns out the bowl for my session was originally filled with the # of spots that could be accommodated in the room, and the 3 tabs inside my bowl meant my workshop was practically sold out. (It was a great reminder for me (and to anyone reading this) to not make assumptions!!)
Confession #3: I think I got more out of the experience than anyone. I don’t think there is anything more validating than when people spend time to learn how you’ve navigated your life path with genuine curiosity. The mistakes, the triumphs, the truth. Thank you so much to YWIB and all the amazing women who I met at Beyond Pink 2010. You all left a definite MARK on my heart.