Rainy Days
For those who know me personally, it will come as no surprise to hear me say – I’m not a big fan of rain. That said, after spending months studying Eckart Tolle’s work I know better than to resist the present moment and instead accept it for what it is, as that will allow it to pass through. So, instead I got to thinking what will make me feel great during these rainy days? What I came up with was that it is a great time for me to do some imagining…
I’m very much a busy body, frequently on the run and sometimes don’t take enough time to sit and ponder my life: Where I’ve been, where I wish to go, what I want to experience, who’s company I want to enjoy? I often talk about the fact that thought without action won’t yield any tangible results. What I’m realizing in taking this time out to reflect upon things is that action without thought won’t get you what you really want in life.
What do I want? Seems like a fairly innocent and straightforward question – but is it? In my experience, both personally, and as an observer in many of my clients lives there seems to often be a drastic difference between what we really want and what we think we can get. It’s easy to ask for something that you can see a clear path in which to receive it. The real answer to the question “what do I want?” often doesn’t outline a clear path for you to follow and therefore becomes, often down right scary. But, will playing small, playing within the boundaries of what “looks” possible really allow your heart and soul to sing out? Will playing small give you the energy to live your life to it’s fullest potential?
Take some time during these rainy days and ask yourself the question: What do I want? One recommendation I have is write the question out with your dominant hand, then, put the pen in your non-dominant hand and write down whatever answers come to your mind. Don’t judge yourself, don’t worry about how you’d make “that” happen, just have fun with it. Go big – don’t hold back.
Let me know how it goes,
H
Throw a dart!
Whenever I teach goal setting I always tell the participants that no matter what your goal is you have to put a date on it. I call this step in the process, throwing a dart out there. I call it that because we don’t always know exactly how much time will be required for us to see the goal through to fruition. However, the reason the date is so important is that without having it you have no timeline. Therefore, you have no understanding or comprehension of the fact that where you are today and who you are today, will be very different from where you are and who you are when you achieve your goal.
The second component is that you will have no way to measure your progress without knowing when you expect to achieve the goal. If you can’t measure it you can’t manage it! Furthermore, you will have no way of knowing whether or not you are on track towards the achievement of your goal. One of the things to remember is that to get what you’ve never had you must DO what you’ve never done. Goal achievement is all about action.
By setting a date you are able to work backwards. Think to yourself, “what is the last thing that will need to happen before I can say I’ve reached my goal?” From there continue to plot the reverse course of action all the way back to where you are today. This enables you to embrace all the action steps that you will need to take in order to see your goal through to fruition.
For example, let’s say you wanted to lose 30 lbs of weight within the next 12 months. Right away we know (simple math: 12/30 = 2.5) you will have to lose 2.5 lbs per month in order to achieve that goal by the end of the 12 month period. The next step is to plan what ACTION steps you are willing to take in order to lose 2.5 lbs per month. Lastly, deploy the plan. Now, at the end of the first month you will know whether or not you are on target to reach the goal. If you’ve only lost 1 lbs by then end of the first month you will immediately know you need to tweak the ACTION steps in order to get on course.
By throwing a dart out there (setting a date) you are able to plan the ACTION steps you need to take. Furthermore, you can begin to MEASURE almost immediately whether the ACTION steps are moving you in the direction of your goal and whether or not you are on target. This way you can tweak your plan right away if you are not on track. This date is not set in stone and it is not there to make you feel bad if you require more time to see your goal through to fruition. It is there to help you get STARTED on the road of ACTION steps so that you will see the results you are looking for and achieve your goals!
Burst Your Bubble
I was chatting with one of my colleagues this morning and because we both live and work in the field of personal development it is always the basis of our conversation. Today we were talking about how challenging the last step is prior to a major breakthrough in life. Even for us, with a plethora of combined knowledge and access to information the last step is still tough.
I often think of it as a living inside of a bubble. The bubble we presently occupy consists of all our current belief systems, perceptions, basically the “system” we operate ourselves with. As we grow as people and expand our level of awareness, through education, we begin to fill more and more space within our bubble. Eventually, if we continue to seek out information, we start to rub up against the boundary of the bubble that we are living in. The friction and tension that is a result of pushing up against the barrier signifies the “last step”. If you push through you end up bursting your bubble only to find yourself inside a new world, a bigger, brighter bubble. However, the pitfall is that the tension overwhelms us and we shrink back to a place of comfort.
So, how do we avoid this?
Step one is always awareness. Ok, so I’ve covered that, now you know what’s coming. The feelings of overwhelmingness start to creep in and your mind starts telling you that it would be easier if you went back to doing what you know.
Step two is to counteract! Even though your self-talk may start to stray from the objective you MUST take control. Remind yourself of all the good that you desire and all that you deserve to accomplish. If you don’t already use them, introduce affirmations. Tell yourself that you are worthy of what you are working towards and that you will persevere! Furthermore, create a vision or an image board. It’s easy to forget why we are doing all this hard work if the goals and objectives are not visible. When we lose sight of the image in the minds eye is when it is most important to have something ready in the physical world.
Step three is simply to have faith and believe. If you have the desire to do something, be something or have something, you already have within you the capability and potential to see it through to fruition. You’ve planted the seeds of growth, you’ve developed and cultivated them, the key now is to believe that they are growing. We don’t “see” grass until it bursts through the surface of the Earth, but that grass has been working hard beneath the ground to make it to that glorious day. The same is true here. Just because we can’t “see” the objective today doesn’t mean it won’t arrive tomorrow. Believe and succeed!
Burst your bubble – it’s worth it!
Remember: to get what you’ve never had, you must do what you’ve never done.
Don’t Assume
I was meeting with a client last week who gave me permission to share this story as an important lesson to entrepreneurs/business owners about making assumptions.
This gal is a successful health care practitioner who had been working with a new client for a couple of weeks. They had been doing the initial assessment work in order to come up with an appropriate treatment plan for the client. When my client sat down to present the treatment plan to her client she made a HUGE mistake. She assumed, based on what she had picked up on as information, that her client was not in a financial position to do as intensive a treatment plan as she would like to suggest. So instead, she said to her client “I understand that financially, it’s probably not feasible for you to come in 3x per week, but, I think we can get you to where you want to go with 1x per week and some homework for in between sessions”. To which her client replied “Money is no issue for me, in fact I was planning on brining my 4 kids in to see you because I love the way you work”.
Woops!!! Be very careful in business and in life not to assume where people are at. Instead ask the right questions and be curious. Luckily in this case, my client was able to ‘eat her words’ and didn’t lose the sale and her client is indeed bringing her 4 kids. But it’s a great lesson and reminder for us all – Don’t assume! Ask questions instead.
Success is not a Thing!
“Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.” – Earl Nightengale
Being an over achiever I have always been interested in rising to the top, but, looking back, I had a very skewed image of what success was. I thought success was a thing, a destination, a finish line. I thought success was having things: homes, cars, clothes and vacations. I thought success was popularity. I thought success was money, lots of it. I was wrong!
I love this definition of success because it encourages leadership and creativity. It is a statment of movement and growth. But, most of all I love this phrase because it promotes the concept of abundance. There is no limitation in his definition. It can apply to anyone at anytime. Furthermore, there is no competition. Success is not beating everyone else.
Progressive – a movement forward
Realization – to make real; to understand fully
Worthy – having value, merit
Ideal – principles or values that one actively pursues as goals
Using these definitions, success is a forward movement to fully understand, or make real, a principle of value that has merit. In other words, success is a movement, it’s a progression, a realization. Success is a journey, not a thing. Set big goals that are worthy of you, see them through to fruition, grow and develop as an individual and you will have success. The homes, cars, popularity, money etc. are merely results of your commitment and dedication to a life of success.
Failure – Inevitable
If I had a quarter for everytime someone told me that they don’t like doing things they aren’t naturally good at, well, you know the rest. There is no doubt in my mind that each of us is blessed with our own uniqueness and that we will naturally be drawn to specific areas, but, that doesn’t mean that things come easily. Consider people that are at the top of their game, be it in sport, business, art, dance etc. Did they start, day 1, at the top? Of course not, they started at the bottom, but, the difference is they didn’t quit on day 1 when they realized it wasn’t going to be a cynch.
Failure is inevitable on the journey to success. The differences between those who rise to the top and those who pack it in on day 1 are many. Ask yourself this: when I’m faced with an uphill climb full of adversity, struggle and impending failure do I turn back or rise to the top?
Perserverance, a positive attitude, a winner’s image, faith and will power – all qualities you must master if you plan to break down the barriers and climb to the top. Is your goal or your dream worth all the hard work? If the answer is no, then you have the wrong goal or the wrong dream. Those who make it to the top are determined. They will stop at nothing because they would rather die than give up on their dream or goal. The daily grind on the journey as they rise to the peak of their respective mountains is all worth it once they get there and look around.
Will I see you at the top?
Check out the link for an added boost:
To do or not to do?
I recently re-read, for I think the 4th time, Timothy Ferriss’s phenomenal book “The 4-Hour Workweek” which is packed cover to cover with concepts and ideas that are imperitive for ensuring you are living the life you choose. If you’ve been entertaining ideas of a different life than the one you lead today what’s stopping you from taking it to action? Probably fear. Fear of what?
Fear of taking the leap and the net not appearing.
Chapter 3′s Q & A portion helps de-mystify the impending “fears” that hold us back from stepping out of our comfort zone. The following are examples of those tough, mind-bending, but, all together necessary questions each of us needs to entertain if we are to break down terror barriers and make the big changes we want or need to make in our lives.
1. Define your nightmare, the absolute worst that could happen if you did what you are considering?
2. What steps could you take to repair the damage or get things back on the upswing, even if temporarily?
3. What are the outcomes or benefits, both temporary and permanent, of more probable scenarios?
4. If you were fired from your job today, what would you do to get things under financial control?
5. What are you putting off out of fear?
6. What is it costing you – financially, emotionally, and physically to postpone action?
7. What are you waiting for?
Get Started
“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” – Chinese Proverb
Whatever it is you’ve been putting off, start today. It’s amazing how much of the work is done once we actually get started. Don’t wait to make some changes in your daily habitual routines – do it now. All the energy you’re putting into thinking of reasons that you’ll put it off until tomorrow, next week or next month, use it to get going today. Once you’re on the road the journey doesn’t seem as long or as daunting.
Procrastination is opportunity’s natural assasin. Take the first step and get started!
The Magic is in your Message
It never ceases to amaze me, how many people, regardless of what kind of professional capacity they have, who introduce themselves via their title. This can be a costly mistake especially considering the market and the amount of choice that consumers have every day. If your message isn’t quick, clear and MOST importantly, emotionally engaging, you will miss opportunities all the time. READ MORE
Clarity for entrepreneurs comes in the form of SYSTEMS
Ok, so now that you’re rejuvenated after taking a rest yesterday, it’s time to get serious on building a business, in case you made the mistake, like so many do when they turn to self employment, of buying a job. Being a slave to your business is no better than having a boss to answer to, so today, answer the following questions to make sure you are working on your business, not just in it.
1. Are you following a written business plan?
2. Do you have a system for tracking all the opportunities that come your way? (Prospects, leads, strategic alliances, champions)
3. Do you have a flow chart, or sequence of events, for turning prospects into clients?
4. Do you have a weekly schedule that you follow?
5. Do you have a system and/or schedule for engaging in social media forums? (Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In etc.) READ MORE
