Yesterday, unplanned and out of nowhere, I spent the entire day cleaning and de-cluttering my apartment. Now, talk to anyone who knows me and they’ll tell you, I’m fairly organized. I like things neat and tidy, definitely clean, and fairly sparse – I don’t like a lot of trinkets; pictures yes, trinkets no. So it might come as a surprise that my 650 sq ft. needed nine hours of hard labour, but, it did.
You see, my home has been where I’ve been leaking energy for probably about a year. It’s where I dump all my shit when I come home from: work, speaking gigs, trips, the beach, the ski hill, the gym, nights out with friends and family. It’s been more of a dumping ground than a home. And yet, I knew this, but, it wasn’t until i went to bed last night, after spending the day turning this place in to one of nurture and comfort (and cleanliness) that I realized how much of an energy drain it really had been.
I slept nine hours straight. Now, some might argue that was due to the hard labour, but, I would argue that it was the first time in a long time that my environment created a feeling of peace and tranquility. Last week, when I went to bed there were two oversized armchairs staring back at me, since I’d moved them from my living room, and having no where else to put them, hid them in my bedroom. (Even I’m thinking: “Heather, what were you thinking?”).
The truth is, I wasn’t really thinking. I knew somewhere deep within that it was bugging me – all this extra stuff in my home that I didn’t need or want, but, I just kept shoving it to the back of my mind. Concentrating on all the other things going on in my life. The problem was, deep within the vortex of my mind, it was eating away at me. I couldn’t figure it out – why did I never want to be at home? Was it really because I was so busy doing other things, or was it because my home didn’t reflect back to me the kind of environment I wanted to be in.
Whenever Oprah makes the comment that “your home should rise up to meet/greet you” (can’t quite remember but you know what I mean) I would think, yes, when I can pump $50K in to interior design and decorating services, my home will rise up to me, but until then….
Today I can say, I understand her statement on a whole new level. I woke up this morning surrounded by an environment that I was proud and excited to be in. One that I had created. One that nurtured my true spirit and created space for dreams and thoughts.
This morning, my home rose up to meet me and I feel a renewed sense of energy and excitement. Now, I guess I better get out of bed and get to work, ha!
Have a great day!